Taken from Mastin at The Daily Love.com
"Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure." - Norman Vincent Peale
Instead of trying to change someone to be the way you want him or her to be, here's a new idea: send them love.
Love them, just as they are with no changes and just send them love; see them happy, healthy and living a vibrant life.
We step out of love and into fear when we try to make people conform to our ideal of what we think they should be.
This is out of alignment for two reasons:
1. We are not unconditionally loving someone when we expect him or her to be any other way than they are.
2. We are not unconditionally loving ourselves if we are consciously choosing to be in a relationship with someone who isn't meeting our needs.
It is faaaaar easier to choose someone who you are compatible with from the beginning, than to choose to be in relationship with someone who's potential you see, but who you want to change.
When we choose to only love someone when they meet our expectations, we are letting our ego run the show. We have no idea what The Uni-verse is calling this person to do or become. If we simply put them in the box of our expectations, we are limiting their growth and closing down intimacy in our relationship with this person. A person doesn't feel loved if they are constantly being judged and weighed and measured.
We are not here to judge and value the people in our lives, we are here to be a loving mirror, to show up and to support them in their growth and journey. A person feels loved when they are seen and understood for who they are RIGHT NOW. Sure, we all have growth points, but that's not the point.
The point is, when we talk about creating rich, fulfilling and loving relationships, when expectations and judgments creep in, we have gone down the path of the ego.
Let us release our expectations of others and let us release the expectations on ourselves. Let us love ourselves and the people in our lives right where we are. We are growing daily; let us love the process instead of trying to only love a specific outcome that may or may not be in for our greatest good.
And, let us choose to be in relationships with people we are compatible with from the beginning, instead of trying to change people to be compatible with us.